Tuesday, 25 October 2011

Review - Cold Sweat (2010 - Dir. Adrián García Bogliano)

Completely stupid film.

Imagine the scene, Adrián García Bogliano is down his local curry house. "I've got a great idea for a film!" he says to his gran, "Let's have two nutters who kidnap scantily clad Argentinian beauties and then cover them in Nitroglycerin so that if they move in a jerky fashion they blow up. Kaboom! Cool."

Completely stupid film. And yet I strangely liked it.

To further compound the stupidness, the characters have so many chances to take out the villains, it very nearly goes beyond a joke. It could all have been over in ten minutes: push the big one down the stairs, hit the little one on the head. Job done.

There's more stupidness to come. The film sets out the rules for nitro: don't let it drop to the floor, don't rub it and don't expose it to heat. Okay, that all makes sense. In the next scene, there are more drops of nitro hitting the floor than drops of water falling off a dog shaking itself after a dip in the sea at Skegvegas. No explosion. Then they decide to take all the clothes off the nitro covered lady (okay with me), but surely that would cause some rubbing? And what about cutting her nitro soaked hair? Surely there would be some friction between the scissor blades. Nope. No explosion. Right then. In another scene, they put the same woman in a very hot steamy room. Surely she's going to go pop here. No. She's fine. I don't think it was nitro that she was covered in at all, I think it was Mazola.

I'm still not finished with stupid facts. There is the slowest chase sequence since The Human Centipede. A nitro covered woman carefully moving backwards, being hunted by a fella with a Zimmer frame. It's beyond belief.

Possibly because of all this, I really liked Cold Sweat and it seems to be growing on me even as I write this. There is a cracking mega-slow motion explosion in the latter stages of the film that must have been one of the main reasons for making it. Really cool. It gets going quickly too. Maybe five minutes into the film, everything kicks off and then it never lets up.

Completely stupid then, but that suits me just fine.

If you like this you could also try:
Switchblade Romance, Wolf Creek (I'm struggling here, there's nothing else really like this).

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